By Jane F. Gilgun and Samantha Hirschey, University of Minnesota, Twin Cities, USA

Girls’ aggression is a growing concern in families, schools, and communities. Aggression is disregard for the well-being of others that results in physical, emotional, and psychological injury. For persons who commit aggression, their behaviors are logical, normal, and often necessary for them to maintain their self-respect and the respect of others. Others experience their acts as harmful and even dangerous. Any concerns individuals have for the harm their aggression causes arise after the fact. At the time individuals act, they are thinking only of consequences they believe are beneficial for themselves and sometimes for others. For targets of the aggression and for most other people, these same acts are not only harmful but must be stopped.

These blogs are based upon interviews with knowledgeable professionals, on published research and theory, and on the authors’ professional and research experiences. We spotlight girls’ relational aggression, which is a non-contact form of aggression that is as harmful as physical aggression but that adults often dismiss as harmless.

Persons who commit relational aggression intend to harm social standings and reputations and cause breakdowns in the relationships that targeted persons, usually other girls, have with others. It alters the perceptions of girls who are targeted and affects their social standing. Acts of relational aggression include gossiping, exclusion, ignoring, threatening to withdraw or withdrawing friendship or social acceptance, misrepresentations through innuendo, distortions, or lies, and spreading rumors so that others will distance themselves from or reject targets.

Relational aggression can take place in real time or through postings on the internet and other social media. Adults often ignore this kind of aggression if they notice it at all. They believe that young people will work it out themselves. They can, when all parties are willing and when there is equality in power and social status. If there is an imbalance of power, the dominant person can inflict serious emotional and damage to the targeted persons’ social standing and sense of self. For children and young people, schools are settings where many of these acts of aggression occur. Child welfare social workers often are called into schools to deal with these issues.

Aggression and Relationships

Typically, the kinds of aggression that come to the attention of school authorities are physical, either physical fighting as in punching, kicking, and hair-pulling or throwing objects such as desks, chairs, and computers. Less overt forms of aggression include gossip, misrepresentation of others, and social exclusion. Authorities seek to end physical aggression while other forms may be ignored or dismissed as harmless.

Often the first response of school authorities is to isolate perpetrators, insist that they show remorse, and stop the behaviors. When young people do not comply, authorities often implement zero tolerance policies of suspension and expulsion. This solves the immediate problem, but it is a kind of “geographic cure,” where the young people continue to behave in physically aggressive ways in new settings. Furthermore, expulsion does nothing to help the young people learn prosocial ways of dealing with difficult situations.

Expulsions also may destabilize young people so that their use of aggression increases and becomes ingrained. Finally, expulsion models to young people ineffective ways of dealing with troublesome situations. A great deal of research shows the ineffectiveness of zero tolerance policies. There is wide-spread concern that zero tolerance is not only ineffective but punitive, too.

In the absence of effective interventions, girls are unlikely to outgrow their behaviors but will continue to harm others and their own life chances. They could be set up for life-long trajectories of aggression that not only will affect them but will affect their relationship with others including their own children, families, and communities.

Child welfare social workers are routinely involved in situations where children and young people engage in aggressive behaviors. Early, effective intervention will help children and young people to develop prosocial ways of handling troublesome situations and so open up possibilities for them to lead fulfilling lives and to contribute to the social good. If interventions are not effective, beliefs about aggression become embedded in how young people think and become habits of mind and action that are encoded in brain circuits.

Summary

In summary, girls’ aggression is a growing concern. Child welfare social workers routinely engage in situations where girls in their caseloads have acted out aggressively. Suspensions and expulsions are geographic cures that not only don’t work but are harmful. This series of blogs view girls’ aggression as a relational issue, signaling a breakdown in capacities for relationships based on trust. Effective responses to girls’ aggression are based upon building relationships of trust.

Questions To Consider

Please feel free to leave a comment on today’s blog. As you think about the blog, we wonder what you think of some of the ideas that we presented. What, for example, do you think we left out? Was there anything in this blog that helped you think more deeply about your cases? We hope you consider the following questions.

  • What do you think of the idea that aggression creates mistrust?
  • What kinds of school policies toward aggression do you have experience with?
    • How effective are they?
  • Have you every heard of relational aggression?
    • If no, does this discussion help you to identify these behaviors in the children and families in your caseload?
    • If yes, what are some examples of
      • the behaviors you’ve seen,
      • the effects of these behaviors,
      • and the responses of adults to these behaviors?

Next Blog

In the next blog, we define aggression and discuss two types: instrumental and reactive.

About the Authors

Jane F. Gilgun, Ph.D., LICSW, is a professor, School of Social Work, University of Minnesota, Twin Cities, USA. She was a child welfare social worker for more than eight years and has taught courses and done qualitative research on high-risk children and families for many years. A special focus of her research is factors associated with good outcomes when children have experienced complex trauma. Professor Gilgun’s articles, books, and practice manuals are widely available on the internet. Many of them are free.

Samantha Hirschey is a second year master’s student at the School of Social Work, University of Minnesota, USA, and Professor Gilgun’s research assistant. She did her first year internship at the St. Paul Public Schools and her second internship will be at the Community-University Health Care Center that provides mental health services to residents of the inner city of Minneapolis. She has worked in a variety of social service agencies including with children, teens, and adults with mental illnesses and developmental disabilities. She has a special interest in the promotion of integrated behavioral health in children and families.

References

Tanakaa, Masako, Christine Wekerle Mary Lou Schmuck, Angela Paglia-Boak, & the MAP research team (2011). The linkages among childhood maltreatment, adolescent mental health, and self-compassion in child welfare adolescents. Child Abuse & Neglect 35 (887– 898)

Teasley, Martell L. (2014) Shifting from zero tolerance to restorative justice in schools. Children and Schools 36 (3),131-133.

Tesh, Miki & Joy Learman & Rose M. Pulliam (2015). Mindful self-compassion: Strategies for survivors of intimate partner abuse. Mindfulness, 6, 192–201