By Jane F. Gilgun and Samantha Hirschey, University of Minnesota, Twin Cities, USA

Instrumental and reactive aggression can be non-contact or contact behaviors. In non-contact aggression, individuals use words and non-verbal expressions such as gestures and facial expressions that harm others. In contact aggression, individuals have bodily contact that can be in the forms of hair-pulling, kicking, and punching and also can involve contact with sexual body parts. Both contact and non-contact types of aggression cause psychological distress and may be sources of trauma that has long-term harmful effects.

Contact and non-contact aggression affect relationships in that they cause breakdowns in trust or signal breakdowns in trust. They affect the sense of safety of others who are part of the social setting.

Relational Aggression

As the name implies, relational aggression damages relationships, affects reputations, and social standing, and threatens the sense of self as lovable and worthy of dignity and respect. It is non-contact aggression that includes gossiping, exclusion, ignoring, threatening to withdraw or withdrawing friendship or social acceptance in order to control and hurt the victim, and spreading rumors about the victim so that others will reject her. Relational aggression may be overt, such as teasing, or more subtle, such as not inviting someone to a social gathering. Relational aggression is common in schools and social groups where young people congregate.

The intention of relational aggression is to exclude others from social groups. Relational aggression can occur in real time or through the internet, such as posting unkind comments or unflattering or embarrassing photographs. It typically is instrumental in nature, done for a laugh with no intent to harm, but sometimes individuals use it when they perceive others as threatening them in some way. In such circumstances, relational aggression is reactive, that is in response to perceived or actual threats.

A situation that often gives rise to instrumental relational aggression is when young people are new to a school or other setting. Some others may perceive them as vulnerable because they do not yet have supportive friendships. They take advantage of this situational vulnerability and act in ways that exclude the new persons, often in their own minds, for the fun of it.

Girls in child welfare caseloads may use relational aggression but relational aggression is also common among girls who are not identified as highly stressed and traumatized. When stress and trauma are not at issue in relational aggression, educational programs might help the young people understand that they hurt others by their behaviors. When stress and trauma are at issue, the interventions may require long-term, in-depth work that we will discuss in later blogs.

Relational aggression may progress to verbal, physical, and sexual aggression. School officials and treatment professionals state that girls who have experienced complex trauma are at risk for this kind of acceleration. Early, effective intervention is called for.

Verbal Aggression

Verbal aggression consists of name-calling, swearing, and threats to harm. Verbal aggression can occur in real time or through internet postings. People who engage in verbal aggression often view the situations in which they aggress as somehow threatening to them, either physically or in terms of their own psychological safety and sense of self-worth. They react in aggressive ways in order to protect themselves and not to exclude others. Therefore their behaviors can be considered acts of reactive aggression.

Sometimes verbal aggression is an attempt to control and dominate others, or even as a way of “getting a rise out of someone,” and thus to have “fun” at the expense of others. Under these conditions, verbal aggression is instrumental. The situation is not threatening to aggressors but is one conducive to dominating and even intimidating others.

It can be difficult to distinguish between relational aggression and verbal aggression, as there is overlap. Relational aggression is intended to put a wedge between targets and their relationships with others while verbal aggression is meant to hurt and control others or to show defiance and lack of fear of authority figures. The language young people may use in verbal aggression is not pretty.

A case example. Queenie, 13, physically attacked the school principal while shouting, “I don’t fucking care who you are. You’re going to get it. I’ll fight you right back. I’m not fucking kissing anybody’s ass.” Such behaviors indicate not only the possibility of complex trauma but long-term exposure to many different types of aggression that persons important to Queenie view as normal, necessary, and valued. A simple reprimand will not get at the sources of Queenie’s actions. Queenie requires trusting relationships where she will gradually value herself and through valuing herself value others. In other words, a long-term goal for young people like Queenie is to develop self-compassion that leads to compassion for others. This is no simple task. The final blogs in this series will suggest ways of achieving this goal.

Physical Aggression

Hitting, pushing, kicking, biting, and hair pulling are all forms of physical aggression. Physical aggression can either be moderate or severe. Examples of moderate physical aggression are pushing or slapping, while severe forms of physical violence include stabbings, shootings, and wildings, where are groups of people severely beat someone to death or close to death. As the example of Queenie shows, verbal and physical aggression may go together.

Sexual Aggression

Sexual aggression includes non-contact forms such as sexual harassment, verbal innuendo, sexualized looks, and stalking and contact such as butt slapping, grabbing genitals or breasts, and forcible penetration such as rape and sodomy. Other common forms of sexual aggression among school age young people are the sharing of sexual photographs, text messages, and notes, pulling down another person’s clothing, saying someone is gay or lesbian, blocking or cornering someone that conveys sexually aggressive intent, and spreading sexual rumors.

Summary

As this blog shows, there are many types of aggression. Each type harms other people and can affect learning, social and emotional development, and the development of healthy peer relationships. Children and young people in child welfare caseloads are at high risk to behave in aggressive ways because they have experienced complex trauma and others rarely have helped them work through its effects. Early, effective interventions can result in the development of prosocial behaviors in situations that previously led to aggression. Effective interventions contribute to classroom safety and school safety in general, increased learning, and increased social and emotional development. Early, effective intervention can have beneficial effects in other social settings as well, such as families, neighborhoods, and recreational facilities.

Questions To Consider

Please feel free to leave a comment on today’s blog. As you think about the blog, we wonder whether you have had experiences with relational aggression. What, for example, do you think we left out? Was there anything in this blog that helped you think more deeply about your cases? We hope you consider the following questions.

  • Have you had young people in your caseload who behave as Queenie does?
    • What were their families like?
    • How did school personnel respond?
    • What were the outcomes of the cases?
  • Sexual aggression is common in schools. Have you had young people in your caseload who have sexual behavior issues?
    • What resources were available to these young people?
  • What factors are associated with the development of sexual behavior issues in the young people with whom you have worked?
  • Have you seen instances where young people behave in aggressive ways and have not experienced complex trauma?
    • What have you seen as sources of their aggression?
  • How important do you think differential assessment is
    • In doing differential assessments, what factors might be important to consider?
    • Do you think young people with complex trauma also have personal and social attributes that might be mobilized in helping them deal with the sources of their aggressive behaviors?

Next Blog

The next blog in the series is on targets of girls’ relational aggression.

About the Authors

Jane F. Gilgun, Ph.D., LICSW, is a professor, School of Social Work, University of Minnesota, Twin Cities, USA. She was a child welfare social worker for more than eight years and has taught courses and done qualitative research on high-risk children and families for many years. A special focus of her research is factors associated with good outcomes when children have experienced complex trauma. Professor Gilgun’s articles, books, and practice manuals are widely available on the internet. Many of them are free.

Samantha Hirschey is a second year master’s student at the School of Social Work, University of Minnesota, USA, and Professor Gilgun’s research assistant. She did her first year internship at the St. Paul Public Schools and her second internship will be at the Community-University Health Care Center that provides mental health services to residents of the inner city of Minneapolis. She has worked in a variety of social service agencies including with children, teens, and adults with mental illnesses and developmental disabilities. She has a special interest in the promotion of integrated behavioral health in children and families.

References

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